By Sheri

LEVI JOHNSTON TO FOLLOW SARAH PALIN?

I’m sorry to report that apparently Levi Johnston finally got a reality show like he and Bristol Palin were rumored to have been trying for. (Well, except Bristol really wanted to live a “quiet life” reportedly out of the media — something that Johnston is definitely allergic to!)

According to TMZ, Johnston and his producers are set for the filming of his own reality show soon — probably as we speak. Apparently, several networks are interested in the show which is thought to be (ridiculously) titled: “Loving Levi: The Road to the Mayor’s Office.” The premise is not the same as what Bristol Palin and Levi Johnston were originally going to have – a focus on their relationship and raising son, Tripp.

The producers wanted the show to include Levi running for mayor in his (and Sarah Palin’s) hometown of Wasilla, Alaska. Bristol’s famous (or infamous depending on your political viewpoint!) mom, Sarah Palin, was first on the City Council, before becoming Mayor of Wasilla. The other focus of “Loving Levi” is said to be Johnston’s pursuit of a career in Hollywood. (Oh barf! There goes my lunch…)

Okay, I’ll admit the guy is amazingly good looking (like a Donny Osmond/Nick Lachey cross), but isn’t he missing… I don’t know… A PERSONALITY? Just sayin…

Well, if Sarah Palin didn’t hate his guts enough already I’d say this new show following her footsteps running for mayor, along with cheating on her daughter would just about tighten the noose. After their on again, off again, engagement, I guess Bristol Palin just had enough after Levi Johnston confessed to her that he may be the father of his currently pregnant ex-girlfriend!

BTW, Media hog Levi Johnston showed up with his co-star in an upcoming music video (and fairly close Bristol Palin look-alike), Brittani Senser, at the Teen Choice Awards on Monday, August 9.

By Sheri

WHOOPI’S “ARM TAP” VERSUS MICHAELE’S “ARM GRAB”

Some people just can’t (or won’t!) do anything without making a scandal out of it – even appearing on a morning show to promote another TV show. So is the case for Michaele Salahi – the female half of the infamous party crashing pair who made news last November for attending the White House State Dinner without an invite.

Salahi appeared on The View recently with other women who’ll be starring (ha) on the latest of the “Real Housewives” series, The Real Housewives of DC. (This Michaele Salahi is so fake and unlikable that, no, I won’t be watching that show although I loved Vicki Gunvalson on the Orange County version and Jill Zarin on the New York one!) Anyway, as anyone who has ever watched The View even once knows, the moderator or stage director guides everyone back on topic.

Well, Whoopi Goldberg is the moderator. As she wasn’t in the segment with Michaele Salahi and the other DC Housewives, Goldberg came up to her side and touched Salahi’s arm while telling her to get back on the White House topic. Then, after the show, a huge brouhaha (oh yay! I got to use that word!) erupted about hitting/grabbing/hurting the arm. I think Salahi was just pissed about being noticed for not answering questions about the Obama dinner party crashing – she’s not too bright at all this woman IMHO.

I mean, as if avoiding the questions while still insisting you were invited when it’s clear she and her husband weren’t (The Secret Service have evidence!) wasn’t bad enough, how stupid is it to pick a fight with Goldberg that can plainly be resolved by viewing the tape of The View segment? Yeah, if you watch it, you can see that it wasn’t an aggressive thing on Whoopi’s part. It was kind of a power thing since Whoopi is the moderator; Salahi shouldn’t have been so stupid as to try and make any kind of deal about it!

Anyway, while I certainly don’t appreciate Whoopi Goldberg jumping to Mel Gibson’s defence by saying he isn’t a racist when clearly, yes, the man is and has a big problem in that area, I do appreciate her standing up for herself against Salahi. Whoopi gets in her face and tells her “You know I didn’t f***ing hit you” to which Salahi says she cried and was offended by the profanity. (Oh give me a break, did you think Whoopi Goldberg was a delicate flower? LOL!)

By the way, Michaele Salahi and her husband, Tareq, aren’t only still under investigation for the White House party crashing incident, but also reportedly have at least 30 lawsuits filed against them including not paying vendors for lavish parties/fundraisers. Michaele is also alleged to have a big habit of buying dresses to wear once, then return.

By Sheri

JULIE CHEN WILL BE ON CBS DAILY, “THE TALK”

Imagine a new, daily parenting show with a bunch of women hosts that’s like The View, but hopefully a lot less annoying. Well, that’s the premise of the hour long, The Talk, that CBS has scheduled to replace the demise of the long running serial, As The World Turns. I’m intrigued because the idea for the show is said to be Sara Gilbert’s (Darlene Conner from the Roseanne sitcom) and she specifically wanted Julie Chen. I think these two alone will be way more interesting than any of the women on The View (Joy Behar being the exception! Love her!) Anyway, as if Julie Chen and Sara Gilbert aren’t enough, Celebrity Apprentice alums, Sharon Osbourne and Holly Robinson Peete will join them.
(There are two others too, but frankly I don’t give a damn!)

I’ve only seen Julie Chen on Big Brother (glued to that show!) but she’s apparently been on CBS’ The Early Show for like 8 years. Chen’s a stepmom to 3 older kids, but her son, Charlie, will be turning 1 year old in September. I just find her so intriguing on Big Brother because she’s always so controlled, yet somehow really awesome. I don’t think too many people can pull that combo off well!

That particular blend has earned Julie Chen the nickname “Chenbot.” What’s really cool is that it doesn’t faze her in the least. She owned it, which impresses the hell out of me for some reason (guess I’m not all that hard to impress!). But come on, she’s actually said “I am the Chenbot” and she knows the reason why. It’s her “precise on-air style” she’ll tell you.

Go Julie Chen! I don’t want the Summer to end, but at least when it does and the chill of fall is faintly in the air I’ll have The Talk to look forward to!

By Sheri

BRITNEY PAYS BACK MEL GIBSON

Well there’s someone who appreciates Mel Gibson’s phone calls – Britney Spears. She and Gibson have been exchanging late night telephone calls recently. Apparently Mel’s been confiding in Britney that he’s worried his career is over (hopefully it is!) It seems it’s just like the story of the mouse who pulls the thorn from the lion’s paw and the grateful lion says he will pay back the mouse… Only Britney Spears is the Lion and Mel Gibson is the Mouse (yeah, The Mouse Who Roared!!!)

In February of 2009, Gibson “reached out” to Spears during one of her scandals. Gibson appeared on the Jimmy Kimmel show saying that Spears was “a nice kid” who succumbed to drugs. Mel Gibson said: “She’s lining up to be stoned. I just thought ‘Is anyone reaching out to her?” So, I just called her. She’s doing great now.” This was during the time after his earlier scandals when he was doing what he could to adjust his image. (The guy can be really charming, but if you look close you can see the crazy eyes!)

It was Britney’s father who did a lot at that time to get her back on track. I wonder if Mel Gibson’s parents are still alive or if any of his relatives – even back in Australia could “reach out” to him and get him to check in to get some professional mental help. I wish Mel Gibson would be on Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew which is the only thing I’d ever watch him in again anyway. Drew could tackle Gibson’s addiction to racist, sexist, threatening, panting phone rants!

Anyway, I guess Britney feels obligated to help Gibson as he helped her, but really just phone calls like that isn’t the help this loony tune ranting sicko needs!

By Sheri

MICHAEL LOHAN:  SHAMELESS MEDIA HOG OR DOMESTIC ABUSER?

Oh man! You know how psychologists always say that if kids who are starving for attention can’t get the positive kind, they’ll go for the negative? Well, Michael Lohan may have Peter Pan Syndrome (among other problems!) because he just can’t stop trying for as much media attention as humanly possible. Even his past partner in (starved for media attention) crime, Jon Gosselin, seems to have stopped begging for a talk show or interviews or the chance to publicly dis Kate ever single chance he could!

But Michael Lohan never stopped. I was almost (I said almost!) even starting to think that his primary motive was caring about his daughter, Lindsay Lohan, as he brought her water in court when no one else would and called out “We love you, Lindsay” as she was cuffed and ready to be taken to her jail cell. But very, very soon after that…which was just after appearing on every talk show he could (with his lawyer, Lisa Bloom, WTF did he need a lawyer for other than to add more drama?) to talk about his daughter going to jail…

Michael Lohan is in the news right away again in a story that his fiance, Kate Major, was now his ex-fiance because she was charging him with domestic abuse. According to Major, Lohan threw a shoe at her which caused her to hit her head on a wall and he pushed her off her chair, then kicked her when she was on the floor. (Oh Lordy! WTF?)

Kate Major insists that Michael Lohan then said “I am going to go back to jail because I’m going to kill you.” Whether he’s a bad domestic abuser or doing it to try to get more media attention by trying to pull a fake Mel Gibson and then be faced with jail to keep being tied to his daughter for media fame, it doesn’t matter cuz either way, the guy’s a total jerk!!!

What is wrong with this Kate Major? She dated Jon Gosselin then gets engaged to Michael Lohan? BTW, Major was pissed when Gosselin denied he ever dated her. “Jon is a liar!”  Major insisted. “I would love Jon to take a lie detector test.” Yeah, well I would love for Kate Major to take a jerk detector test to help her figure out why she keeps dating total losers like Jon Gosselin and Michael Lohan!

(BTW, on the off chance that anyone gives a flyin’ damn, Michael Lohan’s court date for the domestic violence harassment charge is set for August 18 in Southampton, New York.)

By Sheri

WTF HAPPENED TO SERENA WILLIAMS’ FOOT?

As Judge Judy says, “Don’t pee on my leg and tell me it’s raining!” Serena Williams just announced that she’ll be missing 3 tennis tournies right before the August 30 start of the US Open because she cut the bottom of her foot on broken glass in a restaurant and will need foot surgery to correct it.

Before anyone can confront her about the gaping, WTF holes in that story, she states she won’t discuss any details of the “accident.”

Now, how does a person presumably wearing shoes cut the bottom of her foot on broken glass in a restaurant of all places? This makes no sense! No sense! And if by some miracle this really did happen, why would a person who stepped on some dishes barefoot and had some cuts on the bottom of her foot need surgery that would have her down for the count? At most, a few stitches maybe. (Hey, you know I once knocked the butter dish out of my aunt’s fridge, stepped on the glass from it in bare feet and didn’t even need stitches…)

THE BIG QUESTION: If Serena really hurt the bottom of her right foot like she says, then why was she wearing 2 bandages on the top of said foot in photographs taken at Denver Nuggets player, Carmelo Anthony’s July 10 wedding?

It really gets me pissed when people make up something totally unbelievable then refuse to talk about it!!! I don’t want to care. I don’t want to have to know what really happened. But damn it all, don’t insult my intelligence! Now the wheels of my mind are left to spin (so dangerous lol!) to try and solve the ridiculous puzzle of WTF happened to Serena Williams’ foot! It’s Sunday morning. I should be relaxing with the newspaper while eating Eggs Benny or something, but no, it’s Serena Williams’ stinkin’ foot that I’m thinking about. ARRGH!

By Sheri

WILL SMITH, JADA PINKETT-SMITH & TOM CRUISE
AT WEST L.A.’S SADDLE RANCH CHOP HOUSE

(WTF — DID TOM AND JADA SPLIT AN OUTFIT???)

Photo: Kmm/X17 Online

If you’re gonna make a sort of a Western love story movie and you want to try out a bunch of actors at a table script reading, then it stands to reason you’d want to take them to a Western-themed restaurant in West Los Angeles with a goofy name like The Saddle Ranch Chop House, doesn’t it? Well, if you’re Will Smith, then apparently it makes perfect sense cuz that’s just what he did recently.

Smith’s production company, Overbrook Productions, had a slew of actors at the eatery as a part of casting for the upcoming film, Paper Wings. The movie’s about a romance between a rodeo star and a wannabe country singer. The rumor so far is that Tom Cruise and Cameron Diaz are up for the lead roles, but that’s only a rumor. (Another one is that Will Smith is starting to get into Scientology…)

Among the other actors at the Saddle Ranch table read were Reese Witherspoon and Tom Arnold. (Can you imagine them together in the leads? Oh no, that’s just all wrong!) Maybe Tom Arnold is being considered for a supporting role… It’s interesting that another ex-Roseanne sitcommer, Johnny Galecki (David) was at the read too. (Love him!) So was Jenna Elfman  (not from Roseanne, but had her own sitcom, Dharma and Greg).

I wonder if most actors think table reads are easier than on stage auditions? I guess it wouldn’t make much difference… or would it? Would any actors like to comment and prove me wrong? Go ahead — make my day!

Anyway, Paper Wings sounds like it could be good… I’d probably watch it. Now that I’ve boycotted all Mel Gibson films, I’ve got some openings in my movie watching schedule!

By Sheri

JESSICA SIMPSON AND ERIC JOHNSON IN ITALY

What a way to spend your 30th birthday – all low-key and lovey-dovey with your new boyfriend in Italy as well as in the company of a few old friends. That’s how Jessica Simpson did it as she turned the big 3 Oh on Saturday, July 10. Her friends and sweetie, Eric Johnson, surprised Simpson with a cake and the tone for the Italian trip was laid back just the way Jessica wanted it. She had commented to press that she wanted to get away to Italy to relax and apparently it was mission accomplished.

I guess she needed a break from filming the second season of her reality show, The Price Of Beauty. (I have to fess up that I haven’t seen the show yet. The one time I had the chance to catch it I passed on it for something else and I can’t even remember what!) Hey, though, I admire the woman! I’ve seen the way she stands up for herself and admire her for the way she handled the “chubby” remarks she so rudely received.  People can just be so judgmental and just mental..

Simpson’s fallen for another footballer this time, so hopefully the romance will end better than it did with Tony Romo. Interestingly, Romo broke up with Jessica on her birthday last year and now here she is on her birthday this year with a new football guy.

Eric Johnson, 30, hasn’t actually played football officially since 2008 due to an ankle injury the free agent suffered. Johnson’s played for the San Francisco 49ers and the New Orleans Saints. Apparently the word on the street is that Johnson is a nice guy who won’t hurt Jessica… (hopefully, he won’t embarrass her by announcing she’s “sexual napalm” either like that ass clown John Mayer did!)

By Sheri

MEL TELLS OKSANA: “I WILL BURY YOU IN THE ROSE GARDEN”

Sooner or later the truth leaks out. Sometimes, if you’re lucky, it’s on a tape recording. This is the case now as the mystery of Mel Gibson’s filing of a restraining order against his ex girlfriend and baby mama, Oksana Grigoreiva, recently now makes sense. He was likely trying to make it appear that she was the one out of control, but (thank God!) it seems he underestimated her intelligence and guts as Oksana taped some of Mel’s threatening, racist, sexist rants to her! (Good for her!)

After an alleged January 6, 2010 incident in which Oksana Grigoreiva claims that Mel Gibson struck her twice in the face while she was holding their infant daughter, Lucia, Oksana decided (brilliantly!) to tape record at least one of Mel’s tirades against her. Some of the voiced tape recordings were recently released to the media.

Oksana asks Mel “What kind of man hits a woman twice while she’s carrying a baby in her arms?” To this, Mel replies: “You f***ing deserved it!”

And there we go, admission of guilt right there. But Mel doesn’t stop there. He attacks Oksana for dressing too provocatively (well you left your wife of 30 years for her so you must have  liked the way she dressed, stupid Mel) telling her: “You look like a f***ing pig in heat and if you get raped by a pack of niggers (oh this is terrible and ignorant! What a loser!), it will be your fault.” (Oh and he also uses the terrible term “wetback” on these tapes to insult Hispanics!)

And still the Mel rants on…

“I am going to come and burn the f***ing house down, but you will blow me first.” (Oh what a romantic sweet talker.)

and on…

“I will bury you in the rose garden.” (Just creepy)

I’m embarrassed to think I used to have a celeb crush on the guy back in 1990 in Bird On A Wire. Well, ever since the DUI and his antisemetic drunken ramblings about Jews starting all the wars (ignorant AND *so* ironically wrong!) I’ve boycotted all his movies – no more watching reruns of Lethal Weapon 1,2,3 et al.

I wish everyone would boycott his movies!!!! (On the positive side, famed Hollywood agency, William Morris, just dropped their representation of Mel Gibson like a hot potato! (Yay W & M!!!) (W & M wanted to dump Mel after the antisemetic stuff, but kept him on after he publicly apologized. I don’t think that’s gonna help him this time!)

P.S. — Smartie that Oksana is, she’s stashed away pics from Mel’s alleged Jan.6 beating of her. The photos, which show Oksana with black eyes and missing front teeth, should soon surface… (I wish OJ’s ex, Nicole Brown Simpson’s beating photos would have been made public a lot sooner too!!!!)

By Sheri

LINDSAY LOHAN HAS ONLY 2 WEEKS OF FREEDOM LEFT

Lindsay Lohan appeared in the Beverly Hills Municipal Court this afternoon for her probation hearing. (She entered the court a smart 10 minutes early and was dressed much more conservatively than last time.) Her expression looked rather indignant, yet also alert and concerned as she scribbled something on a legal pad (as well as F****You on  her left middle fingernail apparently!) during the prosecution’s grilling as the prosecution told the judge that Lindsay violated the terms of the probation. Stemming from her 2007 DUI, drug possession and second DUI, the judge had ordered that Lohan was to attend alcohol education classes regularly.

The prosecution argued that Lindsay had missed 9 classes. The judge looked through excuse reports from the alcohol education center. Lindsay herself spoke saying she wasn’t taking this as a joke and didn’t know she was thought to be in violation. She was given permission from the center to make up the times she said; due to her career she had a different schedule than most people (this is true — film business, but still). The judge said that she had ruled that no matter what Lindsay was to have gone to every class without missing any.

The prosecutor grilled the co-owner of the alcohol education center, Cheryl Marshall, who seemed scared to death and confused. Marshall testified that Lohan did go to the classes including group classes. The prosecutor had to ask Marshall several times how many people were in the group classes — she wasn’t going to let that one go because Lindsay was the only person!

The judge found Linsday guilty of not complying with the court order to attend all 27 classes. Lohan’s lawyer feebly tried to argue she missed 7 not the 9 the prosecutor claimed. Tomatoes Tomahtoes at that point! The judge wasn’t impressed! She rattled off Lindsay’s excuses of being on a film shoot and being stranded in various world locations.

Worse, the judge pointed out that during the drug charge, Lindsay denied everything, at one point saying “I don’t do drugs” when cocaine was found in her pants.

By the way, Lindsay’s (es)strange(d) dad, Michael Lohan, was at the hearing and again asked the judge to send Lindsay to residential rehab rather than jail. He’d written letters to the court previously, asking the judge to send his daughter to residential rehab so that she can get help for her substance abuse problem. Michael says that Lindsay has a prescription drug addiction, which not surprisingly, Lindsay denies.

Lindsay broke down in tears when the judge finally ruled that Lohan must serve 90 consecutive days in prison (30 for reckless driving, 30 for the first DUI and 30 for the second DUI) followed directly by 90 days in rehab. I don’t think Lindsay could believe it: she pleaded quietly with her lawyer, but of course there was nothing the attorney could do. That was the judge’s final ruling and the judge was dead serious.

The judge didn’t miss citing all of Lohan’s errors including trying to blame her DUIs on other people. Lindsay had said “the guy in the orange shirt” had been driving,  denying that she was. When he said no way, he was not the driver, the judge reminded Lindsay that what she had done was say “oh, it was the guy in the white shirt” who also denied it and Lohan was proven to be the driver.

Lohan’s surrender date — meaning the day she has to start serving the 90 day jail term followed by 90 days in rehab — is July 20. Linsday has 2 weeks of freedom, but can’t drink or drive (or drinkanddrive!). It’s sad that this came down to jail and forcing her to go to rehab, but maybe now she’ll realize how serious her problems really are! (Hopefully!)